Hmmmm. In the throws of passion, how come you never stop and think about how much braces are going to cost? Nope, never once crossed my mind! Sophie is on round two of braces. Gavin still has his braces on and is looking like he may be in them another year. Grayson has his big evaluation with the Ortho this next month. Yep, count 'em. Three kids in braces. Ouch! And I am not talking about the kids!
How much do pizza delivery guys make?
On my way to my all time weight high. That includes being pregnant. I just said that OUT LOUD! This is blog therapy, right? I care enough to obsess about it, but don't really care enough to do anything about it. I am a failure. I look disgusting. I am disgusted. All these thoughts are constantly going through my head but it doesn't make me want to change. Am I depressed? Maybe. The only thing that makes me feel good anymore is stuffing my face. I know I need to change but where do you start when you feel like you have gone too far?
Help me. But don't try to help me by offering me the quick fix. You know what EVERYONE seems to be doing these days. I really do feel like that product is like a band-aid. A quick fix that really won't help the queen of yo-yo diets. Sure you lose weight, but you are not fixing why you are fat to begin with. If I don't fix me, then I am bound to just get fat again. It's happened way too many times before and I know it will just happen again. What I really need is Jillian Micheal's to yell at me, make me cry, and break me down to find out why I am in this tail spin. I need that ah-ha moment. In order to get her to yell at me I need to gain another 50 or so pounds and that is not an option. Or maybe it is. I am thinking that I needed not to buy that cool counter top ice cream maker! Such a weighty issue ;)
When the earthquake hits, those empty water jugs in the basement aren't going to do us a lot of good.
Del Taco?
The Dermatologist was right. My face is getting way worse before it gets better. I hope I actually get to the 'it gets better" part! Wished I would have just gotten zits when I was a teenager like a normal person.
So grateful for my amazing kids. For reals. They are good just because they are good. In spite of what I put them through, they are still good. I love them!
I think it should be illegal for people to post fat pictures of you on their blogs without your permission.This is why I don't let people take my picture. Why did I pose for that picture? Dang! I am calling the blog police.
Snow? Again?
Feeling like making a DI run. I love hunting for a treasure! I love torturing my kids by announcing that we are making a DI run. I can already hear the big "NOooooooo, not the DI!"
Maturation program!!! NOoooooooooooo! A little piece of innocence gone forever.
Friday, March 19, 2010
Just Keeping Things REAL
Posted by Stacy at 8:50 AM
Labels: crazy mom stuff
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14 comments:
For me...I got that ah ha moment! NEVER will I go back! NEVER! Eating 500 calories really puts things into persepective! I learned more about ME than I ever thought possible. Find your ah ha moment. Love you!
You do not look disgusting and you are not a failure! Stop talking that way about yourself! Love you!
I have been exactly where you are, more than once. I can tell you what worked for me, though it's still a work in progress. You're right that you have to address the underlying mental/psycological issues first. That's a work in progress, too. We need to talk!
WOW Stacy: That is really deep...Are you a little under the weather? You are wonderful.....I said so...
AMEN! That little voice in your head is the same voice in my head! (It's creepy when you type the things in my head!) Four kids with major cross-bites, adult acne, fb pictures KILL ME... it's just not right! and you're 100% correct... there's no quick fix. It's all still a stupid yo-yo. And eating good food makes everything feel better!
ahhhhh..... there's my response... Thank you for that therapy. Unfortunately, it means I am no help to you what-so-ever! But I sure love you! And saying that I understand would be the understatement of my life!!!
I was just sitting on my couch...staring into noting, thinking some of these same thoughts. I came into the office to make me a workout plan for the week- haven't gotten far yet. Here I am bloggin instead.
Have you ever heard of "Flight of Ideas"? You are cracking me up!!
More seriously, Stacy, you need to be able to see yourself as others see you. It is the biggest fight of my life--the weight thing--but I think you are having your a-ha moment!! Hopefully, I am looking mine right in the face!!
Love ya!!
GET OUT OF MY HEAD!!!!! Your kind of scarring me!!! I was just wondering how breathing air could litterally make me fatter???
Okay Stacy...as for YOU, I have to agree with your buddy Leann. I WISH you could see yourself the way we all see you!
You are an inspiring woman with a heart of GOLD!!! Your attitude and spirit are contagious and you make others (esp women)feel truly special which is a hard but important feat! I know too many people who adore you to let you feel like that about yourself...
So come on lady~ I think you are a babe no matter your size! Your smile is too distracting for anyone to notice what size pant you put on that cute little fanny!
Would you ever in a million years trade those stinkin cute babies you brought into the world for a hot bod?? DOUBTFUL! (I have to remind myself of that daily)
Love you man!!!
So I have been really been thinking about you a lot these past few days. I want so badly for you to be truly happy. I admire so many things about you and I secretly wish we were sisters. :) I know it's hard to hear but you can make a change. You refered to "the diet" as a band-aid. Maybe it is a band-aid, but don't band-aids help you to heal? Will I you gain the weight back? Maybe...but I have to believe that I won't. Otherwise, I would continue to weigh 200 lbs. and be wishing things were different. You have your opinion and I totally respect that. I am happy about my weight loss but I am more excited about what I have I learned along the way. If you want to talk, give me a call. Love you so much!
You are a great person Stacy. One of the best mom's I know. It's good to write down your raw emotions sometimes too, it can be very theraputic. We women are too hard on ourselves, just remember, D&C 18: 10. You're beautiful inside and out!
I think weight is definitely one of the most universal issues that women struggle with when it comes to self-confidence. It's something that - for the most part - only WE can really do for ourselves. But that's why it's so hard. I don't know the answers, but I'm sure there are a lot of them. It takes physical work as well as emotional and spiritual work to find our happy medium when it comes to weight (haha, get it? not small, not large, just medium). It takes soul searching to find our true weaknesses, our abilities, our potential, and becoming at peace with ourselves. As women we are so blessed to bear children, but that definitely changes our bodies... I'm just at the beginning of this motherhood thing, so what do I know :) but I am grateful for women like you who have been a friend, an example, a mentor to me as I begin this journey. I love you and I miss you! I'm secretly jealous of the YW leaders who get to work with you. :) And I want to end with a link to a beautiful post about the essence of woman, written by cjane (NieNie's sister): http://blog.cjanerun.com/search?updated-max=2010-03-30T19%3A55%3A00-06%3A00&max-results=3 She inspires me at LEAST once a week, so may she do the same for you. :) xoxo
Yeah, why did I not get zits when I was a teenager and they are all coming NOW?!!! If you haven't noticed, I have been suffering from acne for YEARS. I have wanted to scrap my face off and start new countless times but when I try it makes it worse, so it's always a lose/lose situation. The sad thing is that I went to school for skincare and it hasn't made me any better at not picking and not putting crazy things on my face. Anyways...feel your pain and to be honest with you, I have NEVER EVER even noticed!! I know, people say that to me all the time and it doesn't matter cause you still see it, but for real, NEVER noticed!!
Hang in there girl!! I'm here for ya if you need to just vent and just listen. I'm a good listener! I can give you some good recommendations on what to do. xoxo
Stacy, I seriously I love your guts!! You are also sooo right...you have to find something you can do long-term. You have to find something that is doable and can be a lifestyle change and.....you have to stop beating yourself up everyday because that is half of the battle!! No one is perfect...everyone cheats once in awhile...and it's ok because it's a lifetime journey we are on taking one day at a time and doing the best we can that day.
You really are one of my favorite people!!! Hang in there! I think you are amazing!! :)
haha, love you Stacy! I am right there with you!
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